50+ Funniest Golf Puns & Jokes Your Dad Would Love

Golf puns

Golf puns and jokes probably started around the same time that golf was invented. There is just something about being on the course that brings the silly out of you.

I par-sonally think it has something to do with the amount of dads that play golf. You almost can’t escape the dad jokes when a group of them get together.

Plus, golf terms are par-fect for puns as you will see in this list of golf puns and jokes.

27 Golf Puns To Make Your Father Proud

What a par-fect shot!

Kiss my putt

I need a par-mit to be this good

Give me another drink, I’m parched

I made us some peanut putter and jelly sandwiches for today

We are taking a trip to the Golf of Mexico

I’m just a putt above the rest

We aren’t putt from the same cloth

Let’s have a par-tee after this

Man, you guys have some course language

I love golf with all my cart

Good game, thanks fore playing!

I can barely read this scorecard, did you write in course-ive?

This game really drives me crazy

I really need to iron out the kinks in my game

Well that was a stroke of luck

To tee…or not to tee

This hole really is as par as the eye can see

You really have caddy issues

I really need to spread my swings and do better

In a land par-par away

I may be down putt I’m not out

Just let it tee

This game really isn’t my cup of tee

I’m just asking fore a friend

I’m running this golf course with an iron fist

Not all men are created eagle

10 Punniest Golf Jokes

What is Tiger Woods Worst Fear?

The Bogey-man

Why do golfers hate pizza?

Because they might get a slice.

What’s the easiest putt in golf?

The fourth one.

Why are laptops so good at golf?

They have hard drives.

Why did the golfer have to get a new par of pants?

He got a hole-in-one.

Why do golf announcers whisper?

Because if they speak any louder they might wake up the people watching.

What did you get on your last hole?


What’s a golfers favorite super hero?

Iron man.

What is a golfers favorite bird?

Any ole’ birdie will do.

Golf is a lot like doing your taxes

You go for the green and end up in the hole

14 Golf One-Liners

That would have been a perfect shot if the hole was over there.

I think you’re really improving, you miss a lot closer now.

I play in the low 60’s. I really don’t golf if it’s hotter than that out.

I just can’t catch a break on my putting

Golf is 90% mental and 10% mental

Our priest is the best golfer in town with all the practice he has had keeping his head down

I bet Golf was invented by God to punish people who retire early

The only secure way to save strokes is by using an eraser

Gold really is easy….it’s just hard to play

Golf was a rich man sport…now it has tons of poor players!

In the early 1600’s beating a club against the ground and yelling used to be called witchcraft…now it’s called Golf

Golf brings out the four year old in me…I struggle to count past 5

Hitting it right, is a slice. Hitting it left, is a hook. Hitting it straight…well, that’s a miracle.

“I don’t say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they’d come up sliced.” Arnold Palmer

How Did We do?

Let’s face it, most of these golf puns weren’t all that funny (notice how I didn’t include a pun there?) But golf puns and jokes really are a great way to lighten up the mood out on the course.

It’s kinda crazy how seriously we take the sport of golf sometimes. At the end of the day it’s a game! So go out there and have fun! Golf doesn’t need to be so boring.

I will keep this list updated while I’m out playing with other funny puns and jokes I hear on the golf course. Thanks fore reading!

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